The Philippine's biggest loser

Reloaded - Day 1

2012-01-29T01:28:00.001-08:00

I started to go back to the wagon. My fellow DJ Peri is helping me and monitoring my diet and transformation.

Today so far, I had

1 orange & 1 pear for breakfast
1 1/2 cup rice, 1 tuyo, 2 chicken tinola - lunch
2 chicken tinola 1 orange - merienda

And I decided to post my pic to see if there are any change. I won't put my whole body shot for the meantime as it would demotivate me.

I feel weak. We'll see.

I'll update you tomorrow. :D

See you guys!

It's Time to go back, I've been asleep for 4 years

2012-01-18T06:21:00.000-08:00

I am shocked that my last post was 2008. It's been a while. And I'm back to my original self. Same Fat ass, same broke person ... but older. I am back to where I am. I came back to our house, more broken that ever.

I decided to pour out all my emotions to get this done and over with. This is my journal. My journal to taking back my life, as if there was a life.

This time. After this I'm going to be more exact. Concise. All my blog entries before was not really as precise as before.

So that's about it for me for the meantime. I'm going to post pics of course of myself.

2012 ... after 4 years. I hope my next post won't be 2020. I feel that I lost 4 years of my life.

It's time ... WAKE UP!

TATANGA-TANGA KA KASI NAHULOG KA TULOY!

2008-12-11T15:07:00.000-08:00

I so love this post from jell, na ninenok din niya kay bob ong kaya ninenok ko sa kanya ... magulo ba? basta nakakatuwa pero totoo!

1. “Kung hindi mo mahal ang isang tao, wag ka nang magpakita ng motibo para mahalin ka nya…”

2. “Huwag mong bitawan ang bagay na hindi mo kayang makitang hawak ng iba.”

3. “Huwag mong hawakan kung alam mong bibitawan mo lang.”

4. “Huwag na huwag kang hahawak kapag alam mong may hawak ka na.”

5. “Parang elevator lang yan eh, bakit mo pagsisiksikan ang sarili mo kung walang pwesto para

sayo. Eh meron naman hagdan, ayaw mo lang pansinin.”

6. “Kung maghihintay ka lang nang lalandi sayo, walang magyayari sa buhay mo… dapat lumandi ka din.”

7. “Pag may mahal ka at ayaw sayo, hayaan mo. Malay mo sa mga susunod na araw ayaw mo na din sa kanya, naunahan ka lang.” –

8. “Hiwalayan na kung di ka na masaya. Walang gamot sa tanga kundi pagkukusa.”

9. “Pag hindi ka mahal ng mahal mo wag ka magreklamo. Kasi may mga tao rin na di mo mahal pero mahal ka… kaya quits lang.”

10. “Kung dalawa ang mahal mo, piliin mo yung pangalawa. Kasi hindi ka naman mgmamahal ng iba kung mahal mo talaga yung una.”

11. “Hindi porke’t madalas mong ka-chat, kausap sa telepono, kasama sa mga lakad o ka-text ng wantusawa eh may gusto sayo at magkakatuluyan kayo. Meron lang talagang mga taong sadyang Friendly, sweet, flirt, alandi, pa-fall o paasa.”

12. “Huwag magmadali sa lalaki o babae. Tatlo, lima, sampung taon, mag-iiba ang pamantayan mo at maiisip mong hindi pala tamang pumili ng kapareha dahil lang sa maganda o nakakalibog ito. Totoong mas maganda ang kalooban ng tao higit sa anuman. Sa paglipas ng panahon, maging ang mga crush ng bayan nagmumukha ding pandesal, maniwala ka.”

13. “Minsan kahit ikaw ang nakaschedule, kailangan mo pa ring maghintay, kasi hindi ikaw ang priority.”

14. “Mahirap pumapel sa buhay ng tao. Lalo na kung hindi ikaw ang yung bida sa script na pinili nya.”

15. “Alam mo ba kung gaano kalayo ang pagitan ng dalawang tao pag nagtalikuran na sila? Kailangan mong libutin ang buong mundo para lang makaharap muli ang taong tinalikuran mo.”

16. “Mas mabuting mabigo sa paggawa sa isang bagay kesa magtagumpay sa paggawa ng wala.”

17. “Hindi lahat ng kaya mong intindihin ay katotohanan, at hindi lahat ng hindi mo kayang intindihin ay kasinungalingan.”

18. “Kung nagmahal ka ng taong hindi dapat at nasaktan ka, wag mong sisihin ang puso mo. Tumitibok lang yan para mag-supply ng dugo sa katawan mo. Ngayon kung magaling ka sa anatomy at ang sisisihin mo naman ay ang hypothalamus mo na kumokontrol ng emotions mo, mali ka pa rin! Bakit? Utang na loob! Wag mong isisi sa body organ mo ang mga sama ng loob mo sa buhay. Tandaan mo: magiging masaya ka lang kung matututo kang tanggapin na hindi ang puso, utak, atay o bituka mo ang may kasalanan sa lahat ng nangyari sayo, kundi IKAW mismo!.”

19. “Ang pag-ibig parang imburnal… nakakatakot mahulog… at pag nahulog ka, it’s either by accident or talagang tanga ka…” -

TOINK! Funny pero me point! ;) ;) ;)

So sino si Bob Ong? http://www.visprint.net/publications/bob/

I put a spell on you

2008-11-22T01:00:00.000-08:00

I know it's a bit late for Halloween, but I feel witchy (invented my own word again hahaha) today. I love this song from the movie Hocus Pocus. It shows the vocal prowess of one of my favorite singer Bette Middler. Enjoy the song! Ciao.

I put a Spell on you - Bette Midler

I put a spell on you
and now you're mine.
You can't stop the things I do.
I ain't lyyyyyin'.
It's been 300 years
right down to the day,
now the witch is back
and there's hell to pay.
I put a spell on you
and now you're miiiiiine!

"Hello, Salem! My name's Winifred, what's yours?"

I put a spell on you
and now you're gone.
My whammy fell in you
and it was strong.
Your wretched little lives
have all been cursed,
'cause of all the witches working
I'm the worst!
I put a spell on you
and now you're mine!

If you don't believe,
you'd better get superstitious.
Ask my sisters!
"Ooh, she's vicious!"
I put a spell on you,
a wicked spell,
I put a spell on you.
Sisters!

Ah-say-into-pie,
Oppa-mabey-uppen-die.
In-kama-koray-ah-ma.
Hey, hi, say, bye-bye-i-i-i-i-i-i!
Bye bye!!!

kawawang bakla?

2008-09-27T21:12:00.000-07:00

I've read this article in manila gay guy. It was an article written by John Lapuz. It made me laugh but it is so true. hahaha

* * *

Si Carol Dauden, na isang magaling aktres, at si Aiza Seguera, na mahusay na mang-aawit, ay umamin na—sila ay mga tomboy. Mukha naman silang masaya sa kanilang pag-amin. Mas naging malaya sila. Natanggap naman sila ng mga pamilya nila at mga kaibigan. Pero bakit ang mga bakla sa showbiz, isang damukal ang ayaw umamin. Yung iba, tumanda na, at yung iba naman, namatay na pero hindi umamin. Namatay nang nagtatago. Namatay nang hindi malaya. Kawawang bakla.

Sabi ng mga kaibigan kong tomboy, minsan daw, nakaka-get sila ng babaeng makaka-s*x nang hindi nila binabayaran. Para ding mga straight guys na minsan talk show lang at isang bote ng beer, confirmed na! Yung mga baklang mukhang babae at maganda, siguro nakaka-get ng libre, pero prangkahan na, yung iba hindi. Kahit mayaman ang bakla or sikat at powerful, pay pa din. Yung iba, hindi cash. Minsan, career or trabaho. Minsan, damit or rubber shoes. Basta, may kapalit pa rin. May mga kaibigan akong nagmamaganda. Mahal daw sila ng kanilang mga straight boyfriends. I asked them, “Try niyo nga huwag bigyan ‘yan ng allowance or work, tignan ko lang kung boyfriend mo pa ‘yan.” Ayaw naman nila i-try. Kawawang bakla.

Ang dami kong kilalang tomboy na ang girlfriend babaeng totoo ‘tapos tumagal ang relasyon. Sa mga bakla, ang tumatagal lang yung bakla sa baklang relasyon. Kawawang bakla.

Lima na ang kakilala kong baklang pinatay. Yung dalawa, ka-close ko pa. Nagkaroon tuloy ng chismis na baka may gay serial killer. Pero tomboy, walang masyadong pinapatay. Naisip ko, itong mga gay killers, they know na kaya nilang patayin ang mga kawawang bakla na biktima nila. Honestly, minsan naisip ko, kung meron kayang bakla na serial killer naman ng mga lalaki? Bongga, di ba? Pero mga salbahe lang ang pinapatay niya. Kaya lang ‘pag nahuli, kawawang bakla.

Parang boring ang kumalat na picture ng Mocha girls na naghahalikan. Pero kung member ng all-male group ang may kumalat na picture na naglalaplapan, kahit biruan lang din tulad ng sa Mocha, I’m sure-manicure-pedicure-kulot, hanggang next year ay headline ‘yon. Pagchi-chismisan sa beauty parlor, palengke, school, opisina, prisinto, at sa batis habang naglalaba. Kasi recently ko lang nalaman, na ‘pag dalawang babae pala ang naghalikan, natuturn-on ang mga lalaki. Pero ‘pag dalawang lalaki ang naghalikan, hindi naman natuturn-on ang mga babae, worst, nandidiri sila. Biased, di ba? Kawawang bakla.

Pag ang mga lalaki nambabae, sasabihin “macho.” Pero pag namakla, “kadiri.” Kawawang bakla.

Pag ang bakla mukhang babae, maganda. Pero ang babae pag mukang bakla, pangit. Hahaha. Kawawang bakla.

Eto, talagang totoo. Pag ang baklang pa-girl malaki ang nota, alaskado siya sa mga kaibigan niyang bakla. Ang tomboy na pamin pag matambok ang pechay, kaiinggitan ng mga kaibigan niyang tomboy. Suwerteng tomboy, kawawang bakla.

Ang dami kong kaibigang Filipino-Chinese na tomboy at accepted ng family nila. Ang dami kong kaibigang Filipino-Chinese na tagong bakla. Yung iba umamin na lang noong patay na ang tatay nila. Kawawang bakla.

Pag may dumaan na bakla, sumisigaw ang mga batang kalye ng, “Bakla! Bakla!” Pero parang hindi pa ako nakarinig na sumigaw sila ng, “Tomboy! Tomboy!” Kawawang bakla.

Ang mga baklang nakadamit-babae, posibleng mabastos pag pumasok sa C.R. ng boys. Pag ang tomboy pumasok sa C.R. ng girls, okay lang na nakadamit-lalaki. Hindi kaya dahil lalaki lang ang nambabastos? Kawawang bakla.

Nabanggit ko na ito dati. Ang dami kong nakikitang tomboy na may ka-holding hands na babae. May nakita na ba kayong baklang hinolding hands ng boyfriend niya? In public, ha. Kawawang bakla.

Yung isang kaibigan kong tomboy, tuwang-tuwa daw ang tatay niyang sundalo nang malamang tomboy siya. Yung kaibigan kong bakla, binugbog ng tatay na sundalo nang malamang bakla. Kaloka. Kawawang bakla.

Pag ang anak na lalaki or babae masama ang ugali, ang tawag “black sheep.” Pag bakla ang anak na masama ang ugali, ang tawag “salot.” May kaibigan nga ako na mabait naman, salot pa din ang turing ng pamilya. Maryosep, kawawang bakla.

Kadalasan ang lalaki, kapag nakikipag-break sa girlfriend nila, kasi may ibang babae. Kapag ang lalaki, nakikipag-break sa bakla, kasi may ibang bakla or babae. Heto ang kakaiba, may kaibigan akong bakla, iniwan siya ng jowa niya kasi nag-born again. Ang say ni bakla, “Anong palagay niya sa akin, demonyo?” Kawawang bakla.

Ang batang lalaki ‘pag kumikendeng, sasabihin “bakla paglaki.” ‘Pag ang batang babae, macho kumilos, sasabihin ay “boyish” lang. Kawawang baklita.

Ang mga babae tuwang-tuwa ‘pag pumupunta sa gay bar. Ang mga bakla, kawawa sa pandidiri ‘pag pumunta sa girlie bar. Sure ako diyan. Sinama ako dati ng mga kaibigan kong lalaki, awang-awa ako sa sarili ko. Huhuhu.

Nakakatawa pero nakakasad yung joke na ito (buti na lang joke):

PARI: Ang mga bakla ay hindi makakapasok sa langit.

BAKLA: Ok lang ‘yon Father. Doon na lang kami sa Rainbow, magslide-slide.

Which made me think. Ang mga bakla lang ang makakaisip ng ganoon. Hindi na papasukin sa langit pero nakuha pang mag-taray at lumigaya sa pag-slide sa rainbow.

Dito sa Pilipinas, sa Quezon City na lang, tabi-tabi ang gay bar. Lesbian bar, may nakita ka na?

Alam niyo ba na may mga spa at massage parlor na para lang sa mga bakla? Bongga!

Walang baklang istambay. As in pang lalaki lang ang word na ‘yan. Yun nga lang, may baklang pusher at bugaw pero may trabaho pa din. Bihira ang baklang holdaper. Yung kumukuha na lang ng hindi kanila. May na-meet na akong baklang snatcher at akyat-bahay, at least, nag-effort muna sa pagtakbo at pag-akyat. Hahaha.

Ang word na “pink peso” ay dedicated daw sa pera na kinikita at ginagastos ng mga bakla.
Madami daw bakla sa call center na pinapayagang mag-boses babae kasi boses babae talaga. I doubt kung madaming tomboy ang boses lalaki. Aminin.

May kaibigan akong tomboy na nag-commit ng suicide after iwan ng girlfriend. Ang mga bakla ‘pag iniwan ng jowa, mababaliw lang—iiyak…mag-e-emote…magkukulong sa kwarto…magluluto…magpapa-parlor…’tapos may jowa na ulit. Taray! I should know.

Mas madaming bakla ang nanalo sa mga make-up at hair style competition. Oo naman.
Ang mga bakla, may taste. Pag sinabi naming pangit, pangit talaga ‘yon. Pero pag sinabi naming maganda, ay maganda talaga ‘yon. May kaibigan akong lalaki. May pina-date sa akin na barkada daw niyang guwapo. Sa barkada nila, ‘yon daw ang pinaka-guwapo. Nang makita ko, ang naisip ko lang, “Diyos ko po! Ano pa itsura ng pangit sa barkada nila?” May barkada naman akong babae. Pinakilala sa akin yung manliligaw niya. Super guwapo daw. Pucha, pagkakita ko, napa-C.R. ako.

Ang mga bakla, masaya kasama. Maingay, nakakatawa at hindi boring.

Come to think of it. Hindi rin pala kami masyadong kawawa. Mga bakla, tara na sa Rainbow at mag-slide-slide in this particular order:

RED- Mga baklang pa-girl, operada at mukhang babae. Go, mga sisters!

ORANGE- Mga batang bakla. Slide na, mga anak!

GREEN- Mga paminta, mukhang lalaki, members ng guys4men.com. Slide na, mga pare!

YELLOW- Mga baklang may asawa at anak. You deserved to be happy. Slide na!

VIOLET- Mga baklang bisexual, dito kayo kasi alanganing red, alanganing blue. Go!

INDIGO- Mga baklang Diva at Mama. Halina mga sisters. Mama Ricky, kapit lang po mabuti. Sunod na po ako in a while.

BLUE- Mga baklang tago at ayaw umamin, dito kayo. Kahit hindi kayo umaamin, may karapatan din kayong mag-slide sa rainbow natin. Ingat lang sa pagtili at baka mabuking. Diyan kayo sa dulo para hindi mahalata ng bayan na nakikipaglaro kayo sa amin. Don’t worry, we understand. Alam ko, kawawa din kayo. Sssshhhh….

My Love Will Show You Everything

2008-08-30T16:55:00.000-07:00

Saturday Night, My Internet was disconnected after having dinner. I browsed thru the dvd's that we have. I had 3 selection, Fift Element, Ice Princess or If Only. I don't know what the movie "If Only" is but i thought i was a collection of movies that is all about love... But it wasn't. It's a single movie dvd, the movie stars Jennifer Love Hewitt. I never thought that I would be emotional all thru out the movie.

It's about love found, love lost, love found and love lost again. The movie was really playing with my emotions. I dunno if you guys have watched the movie but I think it was way back 2004 when it was shown.

It's a must see movie, i guess for those who just like me lost trust with love. And a lot of people has wrote about this movie in their blogs.

There's this one song that struck me the most. MY LOVE WILL SHOW YOU EVERYTHING, Jennifer sang this song to his boyfriend at the opera house + she composed it too for the both of them. I wonder when will I be able to fall and sing this song to that special someone. harharhar.

my love will show you everything - jennifer love hewitt

haggard, ugly and fat

2008-05-26T01:28:00.000-07:00

My white flag is up, I was beaten by stress. The past few weeks has been a roller coster ride. My friends from abroad arrived all at the same week and I have to spend time with them. Moreover, I have a presentation and a program to prepare for Bagiuo. We arrived in bagiuo last thursday at 11 in the evening. My colleages wanted to have a drink so we did, we finished drinking around 5 in the morning and I was the one who drove the car back to the hotel because everyone was so wasted. I have to wake up around 7 AM because I have to download a presentation, I rushed at the coffee shop at the lobby and downloaded the file and went to the organizing committee to have it printed and duplicate 200 copies. I had a quick nap ... 30 mins to be exact and woke up again because our Swiss Boss was arriving at 11 in the morning. After that, we had lunch, briefing and went to the presentation. The program ended 8 in the evening. We had dinner and they wanted to drink again. I said I will just get something in the hotel room and they should go to the bar. I didn't go ... hahaha I was so tired. I woke up 5 am saturday and my roomate was all wasted. He smell like alcohol and was doing the suplex to wake me up. I didn't mind him and continued with my sleep. Then 7 in the morning one of my roomate was already awake he said he was going to good shepperd. I just washed my face and we got a cab. We got back around 10 am, everyone was awake. We had breakfast and check out of the hotel. We went around bagiuo to "enjoy" and shop for pasalubongs. We finished by 4 in the afternoon and went back to Manila. We arrived around 11 in the evening and I was scheduled to go to Malate to meet up with friends. I ask my Brother to bring me clothes and I just change in the Car. Took a Cab and went to malate and partied till 4 in the morning. I feel that my body is gonna collapse. I went home and slept from 3 to 8 in the evening. Then i got a text, invitation for a videoke ... I left for manila around 12 in the evening, sang till 3 and went home. I slept again the whole day. I looked in the mirror and I have pimples ... many ... major break out! grrrr. I felt ugly.

I transferred the photos I took in bagiuo, quick photos just to prove that I was really in bagiuo. I hated it. All this stress was reflecting in my face. What's more is that I was gaining weight. I was so stress that I was eating. I have to take control. Battle stress and be gorgeous. I am re-energizing for the next battle.

aaminin ko

2008-03-13T23:37:00.000-07:00

kamusta ka na?
Sana ikaw ay laging masaya
Kasamang mga kaibigan mo
Pakinggan mo ang sasabihin ko

Aaminin ko
Sa lahat ng taong nandito
Aaminin ko
Ikaw pa rin ang hinahanap ko

Tanda mo pa ba
Mga panahong tayo ay laging magkasama
Puno ng ligaya
Di ko naisip na bigla na lang nawala

Aaminin ko
Sa lahat ng taong nandito
Aaminin ko
Ikaw pa rin ang hinahanap ko

Aaminin ko
Sa lahat ng taong nandito
Aaminin ko
Ikaw pa rin ang hinahanap ko

Aaminin ko
Sa lahat ng taong nandito
Aaminin ko
Ikaw pa rin ang hinahanap ko

Aaminin ko
Sa lahat ng taong nandito
Aaminin ko
Ikaw pa rin ang hinahanap ko

Aaminin ko
Sa lahat ng taong nandito
Aaminin ko
Ikaw pa rin ang hinahanap ko

Ako'y biktima ng galit
Ako'y biktima ng pag-ibig
Biktima na lang ba lagi sa mundong ito?

Locked And Loaded

2008-01-31T23:12:00.000-08:00

After 2 of my closest chatmates has left for japan I was stuck in a rut. I don't know what to do next with my life. One day when I looked at the mirror I saw myself looking old and dry. As in really dry. With the driving from manila to angeles my skin got burned slowly. I looked dirty (yes dirty as in filthy).

It was just in time, My plans to disappear is now in full action. It has been 5 days since I have lost communication with my closest friends. My friendster, YM and downelink account is blocked. I ask a friend of mine to change the password until further notice. I'm not yet sure when I will comeback. I needed inner healing ... and I realized that it was not just the inner thing that I should fix. I should also focus on my physical aspect.

Weight Management
Our fridge is now packed with healthy things. Fruits and veggies. Right now I'm back to my Atkins slash South beach slash crash diet. Mid of February I'm planning to go on the "Master Cleanse Diet". Master Cleanse Diet is the cleansing of your digestive system. You will do it in 10 days. You only have lemonade to keep you alive. I know it's drastic but I needed drastic change. For now, I'm minimizing my food intake so that when I do the Master Cleanse Diet I will be ready.

I went back to gym, using what is left of the membership. I have canceled my membership. I was getting bored but I will be dedicated and focus with my last month membership. The good news is that I have an equipment at home to do my weight training. I have a copy of turbo jam, bump and burn and hip hop abs. That would be my alternative for not going to the gym.

I'm at 201 lbs. Only 1 more lb and I would be able to break the 200 line. It's really though believe me. Sleepless nights.

Skin Care Management
Before I never cared about my skin. I don't care if my skin is dark or if I have pimples. But as you grow older this things matter. My arms and face is not the same color as my body and lower extremities. I have darker skin on the arms and the face.

I've heard several things about this wonder drug, GLUTHATIONE. I haven't tried it yet so this would be the first for me. I rushed by to the nearest drugstore and bought a bottle of it. We'll see if there would be any improvements.

With me taking gluthatione, I was advice to minimize my exposure to the sunlight but if it is unavoidable, I should wear a sunscreen or a sunblock. So I bought a sunblock too. The recommended SPF (Sun Protection Factor) was 50. The highest SPF that I saw was 35. I realized that with sunblock the higher the SPF the more expensive it becomes.

Also, when taking in Gluthatione the other skin layer should also be removed using exfoliants such as tretinoin or diamond peel. The diamond peel, I cannot afford now. So I settled for the Kojic acid soap. I think this would help remove the dead skin cells from your skin. Thus exposing the fairer complexion that was the result of the Gluthatione intake.

I've notice that there are lines now appearing at the side of my eyes. Maybe it's with the chain smoking. I purchased Pond's age miracle cream. It promises lesser visible lines, finer pores and more supple skin in just 7 DAYS! hahaha I feel like a commercial model. Anyway, with regards to smoking I was trying to quit, remember my blog ... the withdrawal thingy ... I'm trying to quit but it's really hard. Any suggestions?

I guess that's about it! I'm locked and loaded. Before I end this blog, I would like to quote Hilda (Ugly Betty's sister) - "Gorgeous doesn't just happen".

Bridge

2008-01-16T01:44:00.000-08:00

Twice it had happened to me. I would have a friend. The person will be very close. Not knowing that you are falling for that person slowly. You tried to kill the emotion because you know it's not right. Let's call this friend Person 1. Then you have another friend, Person 2. You introduce them and slowly they become close. Then you realize that you are falling for Person 1. Then Person 2 tells you that he/she is falling for person 1. You tried to hide it. Then the inevitable happens. You become the bridge of Person 1 and Person 2. You did, you tried to arrange things for the both of them. But deep inside you are hurting. As a good friend, we don't show our emotions. But as their "getting to know" stage becomes deeper and deeper. You feel that you can't handle it anymore. Pandora's box breaks open and you tell Person 1. He/She then ignores all your rantings and showing that person how much they mean to you.

Then suddenly, out of the blue. Person 1 and 2 hooks up and you are the first person to know. You tried to move away. You tried to forget the emotions. But still you care for person 1 and also for person 2 because both of them are close to you. You wanted to make amense with them but you know you will still get hurt.

Then suddenly you found out that they broke up. And that they both needed comforting. They have no one to go but you. Then both of them reach out. You wanted to get away but you just can't. You tried to be a good friend but you know deep inside that you are not yet healed.

Will you be a good friend to the both of them? Will you try to fix things? You know that they both still love each other. Then all the pains comes back. In the end, you are the one who is affected, you are the one who's left alone.

======================================
DREAMING OF YOU

Late at night when all the world is sleeping
I'd stay up and think of you
And I'd wish on a star
That somewhere you are thinking of me too

Cuz I'm dreaming of you tonight
Till tomorrow, I'll be holding you tight
And there's nowhere in the world I'd rather be
Then here in my room,
Dreaming about you and me

Wonder if you even see me
And I wonder if you know I'm there
If you looked in my eyes
Would you see what's inside?
Would you even care?

I just wanna hold you close
But so far, all I have are dreams of you
So, I wait for the day and the courage to say
How much I love you(Yes, I do)

I'll be dreaming of you tonight
Till tomorrow, I'll be holding you tight
And there's nowhere in the world I'd rather be
Then here in my room,
Dreaming about you and me

Ahhh...I can't stop dreaming of you
Ahhh...I can't stop dreamin

Late at night when all the world is sleeping
I'd stay up and think of you
And I still can't believe that you came up to me
And said, "I love you; I love you too"

Now I'm dreaming with you tonight
Till tomorrow, and for all of my life
And there's nowhere in the world I'd rather be
Then here in my room,
Dreaming with you endlessly...

What Lies Ahead (2008)

2008-01-02T22:32:00.000-08:00

The year ended for me badly. I needed a jump start, a beacon of hope or whatever. I usually check on my horoscope so that I would have a guide on what to avoid. For none believers, to each his own, besides we control our life, I just needed to peek on the future. hehehe I got this from astrology.com. Just check it out if you want to glimpse of 2008

Chinese Horoscope ( Sheep )

Sheep Ratings

42% (5 favorable and 7 unfavorable months)

After what was probably a very favorable, Pig, year this year might seem like a disaster. It is important, however, for you to understand that you are still looking at five, favorable months. There will thus be plenty of opportunities if you do not get down and let negative emotions get the best of you. Your natural inclination is most likely to follow your heart, but you will do much better this year if you can let your head dictate your actions.

Sheep Career

Your management may be pressuring you this year to work even more. You can find spots for advancement and make progress on your work if you stay diligent with the tasks at hand. The biggest drawback to your year is the pressure on you, and your inclination to say yes and take on more work than you can handle. Be rational about your workload and don't be scared to say no if the load is too much to bear.

Sheep Relationships

For the single Sheep, the Year of the Earth Rat could lead to the blossoming of true love. You may find that temptation to date more than one person falls on you in more than one instance. However, existing relationships could be problematic. Be careful not to be overly trusting or you'll wind up hurt later. At the same time, be wary of rumors and gossip, as they will lead to unnecessary arguments.

Sheep Health

Work could be the drain on you, and the more you are inclined to overwork yourself, the more likely you will be to experience increased stress levels and exposure to illness. While this advice is always good, it is even more so this year under the influence of the Earth element. Do your best to not get down on yourself when things don't go your way. Overall, the year should be one of good health if you take the typical steps towards proper maintenance.

Sheep Wealth

Your finances should be looking up this year. Earth years are good years for saving and planning which bodes well for those that keep a conservative mindset. You may be due for a surprise during one of your down months that could turn out to be unpleasant. Make sure you've tucked away enough to cover the costs associated with an unexpected accident or maintenance.

CANCER HOROSCOPE

OVERVIEW: Cozy Cancer will have a great year focusing on the home front. So much of your energy will be giving more to your personal relationships and partnerships. Security and home is such an important part of your makeup and will take center stage in your priorities. Being emotionally sensitive to good relationships that are nourishing and loving will help add harmony in all aspects of your life. The changes you experience in your life will be deeply felt and lasting.

Positive things come from the deep level of attention you give to these transformational opportunities. You will reap great rewards as you learn to expand your communication skills and be true to your inner self and your own personal needs. You are learning new ways of maintaining harmony in your individuality at work and around friends and family. It is important for you to maintain a positive self-image the way you define who you are and how you feel about life as you bring your energy out into the world.

You desire recognition and the more you focus on keeping up a good attitude about your career and life in general, people that you thought overlooked your good efforts will be your greatest and most supportive allies. New opportunities to venture out on your own in business will open up for you, yet if you decide to stay where you are, you will be reaping financial rewards as well. Keep your optimism strong no matter if you decide to move on or stay where you are. Between juggling your own needs and maintaining balance in your relationships, summer will be a wonderful time to get away and take time out for yourself to enjoy relaxing by the sea, swimming and enjoying life.

CAREER: Your career gets off to a good start early in the year and you will feel as if you are in a good place to help others. You can do almost any type of job with your attention to detail, ability to concentrate and communication skills. You have an inherent love for health and the perfection of the physical body, and may feel called to work on innovative healthcare. You work very well with people and would also make a good arbitrator or lawyer, championing fairness in relationships. You may need to slow down.

Become more aware of how you can more carefully communicate your needs and aspirations. You need your best side to come through loud and clear. With your sharp abilities to focus on your work and the strong mental connection you have to clearly express yourself in a very practical and matter-of-fact way, you can accomplish a lot without expending more energy than needed. Your dreams are idealistic and you are excited about your personal success and positive service to others. You have a tendency toward fastidiousness and perfectionism which helps make you a good detail artist. You have a talent for design wherein beauty and functionality are combined.

Your strong heart connection and passion for excellence may be feeling a little cramped by someone in authority that might want you to take a different direction. New exciting opportunities to venture out on your own may arise. You may feel somewhat restricted in the expression of your passionate nature. Develop more faith in your abilities and have a more positive attitude toward your own innate wisdom and abilities for optimum success this year.

LOVE: By putting so much energy into your individual growth, it won't be surprising if you attract a wonderful new love into your life that reflects all your inner work. Take advantage of the opportunities for adventure that await you as you establish a harmonious relationship this year. You and your true love can nestle away in bliss and have the open communication that is the basis for a solid foundation in your future. Creating balance despite a demanding lifestyle will help you to attract the person you desire.

Having a romantic love in your life will open up your whole existence to feeling wonderful in all areas of your life. You magnify the good feelings you already have, and your partner can match your moods in an uplifting way. The more time you invest in creating happiness within your own heart and mind, the more your whole existence will feel wonderful. You have long awaited a commitment and your passion is hard to hide. Relationship security is very important, so going with the flow and appreciating what you have are will help you gain that which you want.

Stimulating moments can bring struggle and blessings at the same time. Spend time to reflect and meditate if insecurity or feelings of uneasiness strike. Consider practical solutions to move this relationship to the next level. What you do to draw on your inner strength will affect how you manifest expression in all areas of your life. The end of the year will be more fluid, bringing the rewards you are looking for.

New Years Evilution (2008)

2008-01-01T14:44:00.000-08:00

I wanted to change for the New Year and this time I am serious. If it sounds evil sorry that would be the new JEX.

1. I will no longer be nice to people that I don't know.

2. Those who have hurt me will pay big time.

3. I will become gorgeous but no one will ever break into my heart.

4. I will treat bitchy people like trash.

5. I will no longer avoid confrontations.

6. I will pay all my debts and they will have debts to me.

7. I will push people (those who hurt me) down to the ground until they hit not rock bottom but hell.

8. I will think of bad thoughts against people.

9. I will not care about people's judgement.

10. They will bow down to me!

11. I will travel the philippines and the world wreaking havoc! those who stands in my way will die!

12. I will be tackless.

13. I will drink and smoke a lot!

14. I will hate nice people.

15. I will splurge.

I can't think of anything else. If you think that's too much! FUCK OFF BITCHES!!!

The Year that WAS (2007)

2007-12-31T17:19:00.000-08:00

Brace yourself because this is kinda long! (for the malicious mind there ... yeah i know, I laughed too! hehehe)

New year of 2008, I wanted to blog about something. While I was cleaning the house. It hit me, Why not write about my life that happened 2007).

Mostly, My life in 2008 revolved in chatting. Mainly in downelink (www.downelink.com). Downelink is a chat for gays and lesbians. I heard it from a lesbian friend that there are a lot of gorgeous guys there. 2006 when I started to join Downelink. There where no chat rooms then. I just cruised around. Then when Feb started, there was a maintenance of the site, saying that there will be improvements. I noticed that there was a link now for chat so I logged in. Funny thing. There were no chatters it was only Me. I stayed till people came in. Then I met some new friends that became regular chatters. Then eventually, the chatters increased. Then On May of 2007 the first get together happened. I was just kidding then, that I would help. But the funny thing is, I became one of the organizers. Good thing Geoff was there, he help me a lot during the first get together. I've met new friends. There was 20+ attendees.

After that first get together. The people enjoyed it. And the meetings became regular. Though I didn't attended most of the gatherings.

Before the gatherings I was already on the quest of losing weight. But it was gradual and the motivation wasn't there. I had crushes on the chat site but I couldn't make a move because mainly I was humongous. So I dedicated myself in losing weight. In a span of 1 year I already lost 60+lbs and I below 200 lbs. The last time I was less than 200 lbs was in HS. I know I am still fat because I'm still at 190+ lbs. My goal weight is between 140 - 150 lbs.

before and after pic the right pic was taken dec 25, 2007

After the 1st get together, I met a lot of new friends. Most of them consulted me with their love problems. The funny thing is I was able to give them advice. They said that maybe I have gone thru a lot or had a lot of relationship before. But the truth is I don't. Maybe I just have a fresh perspective in lovelife.

Time went by and I attended some of the get togethers. Met more people. Some of the people became close to me.

The ended with a Christmas party. I became one of the organizers and even hosted it with Geoff.

The weirdest thing that happened to me was that I fell for someone. I never thought that it would happen. I believed before that it was stupid to fall for someone in a chatroom, but I did. A personal friend of mine had a crush on this guy. I introduce my friend to him. But before that I already had a long time crush on that guy. But I hid it. Then I became their bridge. They would run to me if they have misunderstandings. My feelings became deeper and deeper. I felt stupid. My friend and the guy are now together. I'm still mending a broken heart. My year ended bitterly. But I guess, that's how life goes. The ups and downs ... just like a roller coaster.

New years eve, I cooked a simple meal for me and my mother. Most of my sibling already have a family so they spent the it at their own homes. We weren't able to eat it together because I was so tired and hungry that day. I ate first.

Then I went online and greeted the New Year with my two closest online buddies. Rchard and Njay. I am also very excited because they 'll be in manila this January 6.

In a gist, The year flew by so fast. There were problems that happened, some where solved some where not. Met new friends, Fell in love, got broken hearted, and chat ... and chatted more!

This coming new year would be better. That would be on the next blog. See You! hehehe

Kung ako nalang sana

2007-12-22T20:48:00.000-08:00

Heto ka na naman
Kumakatok saking pintuan
Muli naghahanap ng makakausap
At heto naman ako
Nakikinig sa mga kwento mong paulit-ulit lang
Nagtitiis kahit nasasaktan ...

Ewan ko bakit ba hindi ka pa nadadala
Hindi ba't kailan lang nang ika'y iwanan nya
At ewan ko nga sa 'yo
Parang balewala ang puso ko
Ano nga bang meron siya
Na sa akin ay di mo makita ...

Refrain:
Kung ako na lang sana ang iyong minahal
Di ka na muling mag-iisa
Kung ako na lang sana ang iyong minahal
Di ka na muling luluha pa
Di ka na mangangailangan pang humanap ng iba
Narito ang puso ko
Naghihintay lamang sa iyo, oh-oh-oh ...

Heto pa rin ako
Umaasang ang puso mo
Baka sakali pang ito'y magbago
Narito lang ako
Kasama mo buong buhay mo
Ang kulang na lang
Mahalin mo rin akong lubusan ...
(Repeat refrain)

Kung ako na lang sana, oh-oh-oh..
(Repeat refrain)

Kung ako na lang sana ...

Avoid Stress

2007-11-21T01:52:00.000-08:00

I mentioned that two weeks ago, I have been having this migraine. At first it was really serious, I was taking meds but there was no effect.

So I decided to consult a doctor. We don't have a family doctor, so i just walked in to Medical City in fairview. Then I said to the receptionist that I've been having this problems. Then she said that it was an ENT specialist that I need to consult. I was there around 4 pm and they said that the doctor will be arriving at 5 pm. So I decided to walk in the mall. It was really hard for me to walk because of the pain I'm experiencing. After an hour, I went back to the clinic. And the doctor was late! And the worse, I was at the bottom of the list. Damn. I can't endure the pain any longer! So finally After waiting for 2 hrs. It was my turn.

I told the doctor that I have been having this migraine for more than 2 weeks now. And I felt a lump in my neck. Then he examined my ears, my nose and my eyes. He said there was no infection. Then suddenly, He ask me, are you experiencing a lot of stress these past few weeks. And I said yes. After that he gave me my prescription and paid my bill. I walk out of the clinic.

I didn't know that stress would cause that kind of pain. Usually even if I have stress, I don't get migraine. It was really true. For the people out there, try to live a balance life and try to be happy because if you don't it will manifest in you. A migraine, a pimple, eyebags or maybe even cancer.

Live healthy and leave happy!

Random Thoughts 2

2007-11-14T14:54:00.000-08:00

I feel like writing today, It's a good day today!
The Weather Man
The weather is freaking fantastic! Actually, it's really gloomy outside. Rain pouring in like there's no tomorrow. But I like it. Am I weird? Some people doesn't like that kind of weather but for me I really love it. It's so peaceful outside, people are in their houses doesn't want to go out. I suggest to put on your favorite sweatshirt doesn't necessarily be new. It's a good time for a hot soup or coffee probably then a good background music (not those suicidal songs) chill-out music perhaps. After dinner, a glass of vodka currant in you're hand while nibbling on some nachos. Doesn't matter if you're with a love one or not. Just try to enjoy it. Feel the serenity of the weather. Ahhh Just love it!
===================================================

The Homecoming
On November 18, My mother will be coming home. Mixed emotions coming in but the primary feeling is excitement. It has been a year since my mother left for the US. My brother petitioned him there. In my excitement, I bought new curtains (as in the works, curtain rods and hooks). Partly it's a cover up hehehe. The business she left, kinda fell down but I still manage to retain it but there was a big lost so I'm kind of scared also hehehe

I also got some new ornaments for the our xmas tree. I wanted a gold motif so i bought some gold beads, poinsettia, lace. All Gold! Since I'm on a gold motif hehehe The curtains that I bought was matte gold with gold linings. Hahaha I know what's with the GOLD thing. I posted some pictures: (sorry for the lighting i just used a webcam)

The golden Christmas tree : It's about 8 Feet, I think. The angel on top is a foot away from the ceiling hahaha. I normally don't do this (posting pictures for all of cyberspace to see) but I really love what I've done with the tree.

The Curtains : The curtains is gold too but not the yellow gold but matte, creamish (inventing my own words again hehehe). It looks expensive but I got it from a sale hehehe.

Balls of Fury: Do you see that red things on the right? hehehe the picture is so dark. Last year my motif was for the tree was red. I don't know what to do with those RED BALLS! hahaha So what I did was to tied up the RED BALLS (funny! bwahaha i can't get over it) then hang them! hahaha

BRUNO : The Christmas German Shepard Stuff Toy (try to say that 10 times hehehe)

MORE CURTAIN SHOTS!

And finally, The Traditional Nativity Scene. I think Christmas decors will not be complete. Besides who's birthday is it anyway?

I think Christmas would be better because my mother is coming home. Yahoo!

==================================

Fixing a Broken Heart

It was broken ever since so what's the point in fixing it. hehehe Maybe I should get a new one. Don't yah think?

The Battle Continues

2007-11-08T14:46:00.000-08:00

I apologize because most of my blog about my weight lost is mostly discouraging. I feel that I am not exerting enough effort. As I've said on my previous blog it is really hard. Here are the main reason and I guess some people could relate to it.

1. People saying that you're fat - Whenever some people see me and say that I'm really big I feel bad. I feel that I am worthless and the effort that I've exerted is useless.

2. Dining out or Going Out - I wanted to see my friends but I dread it at the same time because I would be eating food that I cannot control. Most of the time we would order different dishes mostly high in carbs and fats. It's hard to stay away. I don't want to seclude myself.

3. Food at the House - Normally what I would do is to separate the food that I eat but whenever I see the food that was cooked for my house mates I get tempted.

4. Alone in the gym - I think it should be a protocol to have a gym buddy. It would be funner to go to the gym because you get motivated and you won't notice the work that you are doing. Though there is a downside, you might end up eating after the workout.

5. Personal Problem - if you have personal problem like family, financial or even love that might affect you a lot. I am an emotional eater so a small trigger would get me off track and start binging in food.

Anyway, I usually weigh myself in the gym, It has been a while since I was able to go to the gym. When I went out with a friend last Sunday, the Mercury drug weighing grabbed my attention. So I tried it on. The last measurement I did was last November of 2006 and my weight then was 240. I tried again after a year and I got 212. so it's like 2lbs in a month, damn I need to increase my effort.

NOVEMBER 2006

NOVEMBER 2007

The Battle Continues

2007-11-08T14:40:00.000-08:00

I was track again. I apologize because most of my blog about my weight lost is mostly discouraging. I feel that I am not exerting enough effort. As I've said on my previous blog it is really hard. Here are the main reason and I guess some people could relate to it.

1. People saying that you're fat - Whenever some people see me and say that I'm really big I feel bad. I feel that I am worthless and the effort that I've exerted is useless.

2. Dining out or Going Out - I wanted to see my friends but I dread it at the same time because I would be eating food that I cannot control. Most of the time we would order different dishes mostly high in carbs and fats. It's hard to stay away. I don't want to seclude myself.

3. Food at the House - Normally what I would do is to separate the food that I eat but whenever I see the food that was cooked for my house mates I get tempted.

4. Alone in the gym - I think it should be a protocol to have a gym buddy. It would be funner to go to the gym because you get motivated and you won't notice the work that you are doing. Though there is a downside, you might end up eating after the workout.

5. Personal Problem - if you have personal problem like family, financial or even love that might affect you a lot. I am an emotional eater so a small trigger would get me off track and start binging in food.

Anyway, I usually weigh myself in the gym, It has been a while since I was able to go to the gym. When I went out with a friend last Sunday, the Mercury drug weighing grabbed my attention. So I tried it on. The last measurement I did was last November of 2006 and my weight then was 240. I tried again after a year and I got 212. so it's like 2lbs in a month, damn I need to increase my effort.

NOVEMBER 2006

NOVEMBER 2007

IT'S JERICHO THE BITCH!

2007-10-19T17:01:00.000-07:00

“Everything I need to learn, I learned in kindergarten”. Bullshit! Everything I need to learn I learned when I graduated. I learned that in life it’s either you get eaten or be eaten (sounds kinky hehehe). They should have prepared us to be warriors in kindergarten. Learned how to fight. They should have thought us the secrets on how not to get affected by the people that was born to be bitches and bastard. To stand up and go for the kill and feel nothing after.

Being brutal is a thing that should have been instilled in the minds of the people. Because kindness suffocates us, it suppresses our emotions. It makes us weak and it kills us. Hiding things from us just to protect us but in the end when you learned the truth it is much more very (all the superlative hehehe) painful. They should have thought us how to block and counter attack. And the counter attack should be deadly. I grew up always being nice trying not to hurt other people feelings but in the end you are the one who carries the burden. I hope I know some martial arts. I have a hidden passion to learn how to throw a knife and hitting the target in the heart.

I don’t like to be nice anymore, you get taken for granted. But I can’t help it, It’s already part of my skin. No matter how bitchy I tried I can’t remove the sugar and spice and everything nice. I wish that there is a chemical "X" that you can take just like the power puff girls so you can have the power to defeat people or a potion that will turn you to Mr. Hyde.

I also would like to say things to people that is playing in my mind and don’t feel guilty about it. I want to be crazy so I can have an excuse to be bitchy. Slowly I’m feeling burned out. Getting tired. I’m tired of listening to other people and wish that sometimes they listen to me and take me seriously and ask me if I'm okay and really mean it.

THINGS I HATE!

I hate people who likes shortcuts I feel everyone is equal they should go the right way. I hate people who are corrupt and try to make money from you. I hate people that pretends they are listening but the don't. I hate interrupters and won’t let me finish my thoughts it makes me feel disrespected. I hate "know it all people" it makes me feel stupid. I hate it when people corrects my grammar because I feel conscious and end up mixing my words and thoughts. I hate people who doesn’t know how to appreciate it makes me feel worthless. I hate perfectionist because nobody is perfect. I hate my life because it’s like a series of unfortunate events come to life and I feel I'm losing control. I hate people who doesn’t answer text messages there’s no excuse for it. I hate people who doesn’t have time for me because I am always available when they need me. I hate it when I feel down and I feel there’s no one to talk too. I hate people who competes with your problem saying there are more unfortunate and there are more unfortunate people than me.

Wow that's relieving, sarap! try nyo! hehehe

disclaimer : minsan lang to pagbigyan niyo na, If you think I'm a bitch or plastic this blog is successful in stirring up your emotions.hahaha I know you feel the same way too.

Bangungot sa Siesta

2007-10-09T22:49:00.000-07:00

Exactly at 12 noon today, October 10, 2007 my father's package arrived from abroad. The usual stuffs, canned good, noodles, dates, some clothes but what got excited me the most was this 3 big bags of Van Houten Hazel Nut Chocolates. I immediate grab and and hid it. I was craving for this chocolate for a long time since I have been dieting. Then there's also a can of sour creme pringles. I couldn't help my self. I went back to my room and ate the 1 whole bar of the Van Houten as if there was no tomorrow. The sun has not been kind today, It was scorching hot. I went down to the living room and put on a dvd. While watching a munching on the pringles. It was total bliss. In the middle of the movie I fell asleep. Then it happened ...

I was in deep sleep, My dream was very real. I went back to dubai and same thing the plane crashed. I have been having this bad dream before but it stopped. Then it came back again. Fortunately, in that dream I just got of the plane or sometimes when I got left and I would see the plane burst into flames. Have you notice that sometimes dreams are not in sequence. After that unfaithful incident, Suddenly I was like going after a long time crush of mine. He's in UAE by the way. And he said that he's happy with his relationship, to leave him alone and that he was there for his son. I was shocked. Son? you don't have a son and you broken up with your girlfriend. Then I woke up, still lying in the sofa in the living room. My hands was over my head then I felt someone tugging my hand. It felt so real. I couldn't move. I wanted to shout. I was asking .. "sino ka?". The person keep on tugging it. I was trying to scramble but I couldn't move. I realize, I was still dreaming. I'm trying to wake up. Trying to shout but it was like my lips were glued. My right arm was suddenly free. I then tried to hit the center table with my hand. To no use, I was still in my nightmare. I felt that, that was my end. No more waking up. I tried to bite my tounge. Luckily. I woke up. I was drench in sweat. I felt so tired. I wanted to get up but I can't. Then I felt that I was falling asleep again. I forced my butt of to stand up and get water. Then I went up to my bedroom.

It has been a long time since I last had a nightmare like this. Was it a wake up call. Or was I just being punished for binging on chocolates and junk food. Scary. Just wanted to share.

It's Hard!

2007-09-28T17:56:00.000-07:00

What the hell were you thinking? hehehe Dieting is so hard, I feel that any moment I'm going to have a break down and eat all the junkies in the fridge. Last night, I slept around 4 in the morning. I was tossing and turning. I was not hungry but I was salavating for food. I felt I was going crazy.

I texted some of my friends for support just to get my mind off the food. I felt the urge for oral satisfaction. It's still is a long way. Now I know how much discipline is needed to loose weight. Right now it's raining and I'm craving for a hot cup of hazelnut mocha from starbucks. WWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH I'm going balistics here. huhuhu

I wanted to go out tonight but that entails eating and having coffee and booze. I don't know what to do. waaaaaaahhhhhh .... waaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh..... crazy crazy ... grrrrr ...

The Minority Report

2007-08-31T00:18:00.000-07:00

August 31, End of the month and it's time to do a report about what I achieved for august. I was so bored to go to the gym earlier this day. But I forced myself to go there so I could check whether or not I'm progressing in my biggest loser saga. The past 2 weeks, I have been lax on my diet and gym.

The last time I went to the gym was August 15. I really wanted to go to there but unfortunately I have to go to my derma to do the 2nd session for my warts removal and diamond peel. So I had fresh wounds on my face. I was scared that it would get infected by the sweat. Earlier this day I realize I have to. The main reason for me going to the gym was to get my weight. I've read an article stating that if you're on a diet and exercise you have to use the same weighing scale. I have a bathroom scale at home but the measurements are not precise. The rainy days is weighing me down. I was so sluggish it seems that all I wanted to do is sleep and eat. I was worried because I felt that I was gaining weight again. Then the moment of truth came, I stepped on the weighing scale. At first I tried to put on 225 on the meter and it didn't balance, put on 224, still unbalanced, then 223 still unbalance ... this is getting exciting then finally 222! IT BALANCED! I got 222 so that's another 3 lbs lost! I should be rejoicing but a part of me is saying that I could have lost more if I wasn't stubborn not to go to the gym and focus on the diet.

I'm going to tell a secret. This may be shocking, I feel that I'm turning into a bulimic. The last 2 weeks of August, when I eat a lot I would poke my throat so that all the food that I ate would come out. I feel this is unhealthy. I have to say it because some psychiatrist say that acceptance is the first step. So there, I'm Jex and I'm bulimic. I'm going to try to be a healthy eater again that's my pledge for September.
Here is the chart for the weight lost:

I needed motivation so I went to youtube and look for videos about the biggest loser contest. I stumbled upon the story of Jodie Prenger the winner of BIGGEST LOSER UK. It was so inspiring. I said to myself to focus more this sempter. On the first 7 weeks on the biggest loser camp, she lost a whopping 36lbs. If she can do it so can I. Below is the first video. Click on the second link for the continuation.

http://www.youtube.com/v/mr3UtaJgd6c"> name="wmode" value="transparent">http://www.youtube.com/v/mr3UtaJgd6c" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="350">

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B_-Y5wSib_o&mode=related&search=

For September, I will be focusing more and I hope I will lose more!

Reinvention Saga

2007-08-21T07:53:00.000-07:00

"People who cannot invent and reinvent themselves must be content with borrowed postures, secondhand ideas, , fitting in instead of standing out. "
- Warren G.Bennisa

"Are you ready to jump?" as the queen of reinvention Madonna said in her song "jump". This is the thought that is running in my mind while writing this blog. But come to think of it I have already jumped. Jumped into the idea of reinventing myself. hehehe You might be wondering why I am writing about this. I have read from an article that you have to write it down and announce it to your friends so that you have a motivation. That you will be under the scrutiny of other people.

These past few weeks a lot of my regular chatmates for some reason has disappeared from the circulation. Thus, I have nothing left to do. I decided to reinvent myself. I want to look good. Meaning I wanted to loose weight again. "Again", because I have tried so many times to loose weight but eventually failed. What's the difference now you might ask? Downelink has opened my eyes. Because a lot of the people in downelink looked really good and to get hooked you have to be an eyecandy. Funny but true. Light travels faster than sound ... where did that came from? hahaha. Some of them have inspired me to do my share. Two of the guys I have chatted here used to be overweight as in obese! But now they look really good eventhough they say they are still fat, you know who you are guys. Anorexics! Joking! Hehehe love you guys!

Anyway, I have started dieting and going to the gym last week of July. You might be wondering if there are any progress so far. Hmmm a brief history, My last attempt to lose weight started October 2006, and I stopped last February of 2007. From 260 I shed off 31 lounds, My Last weight was 228. I got frustrated because my weight lost went to a plateau meaning I was not losing weight anymore. I tried depriving myself, did all crazy diet stuff so that the weighing scale would move down. Then It went out of control, I got depressed and ate my regular comfort food, carbs and fats that is. Then My birthday came and I realized that another year has passed and still I haven't achieved my goal weight again which is 150lbs, Imagine I need to loose 110 lbs all in all, that's like a whole human being hehehe. Do you see my frustration? hehehe I decided to get with the program again. I checked my weight last week of July and I got 238 lbs, I gained 10 lbs, Ponyeta! Talk about yoyo dieting right? hehehe

I started to lessen my carbo intake, lessen the rice, lessen the breads, lessen the pastas ... all those good stuffs. It's really hard. There are even nights that I can't sleep. It's like withdrawal from drugs ... the difference is carbo, I need to do a study on that if carbo is addictive hehehe. I also did crazy shits just to jump start the weight lost, I won't elaborate on that. After a week I was able to manage to lessen my it, then I stop the carbo intake, talk about cold turkey! I shifted to meat and veggies. I ate all the meat and veggies that I want. I notice that the results were slow. I decided to lessen my food intake but did frequent eating. I notice that the weight lost walloped and I was getting the hang of it. I returned to the gym once or twice a week. I'll be increasing that slowly. I exercise by myself at home. My muscles hurts, I thought I never had them but turns out I'm not all fat hahaha. I'm feeling better now. I'm getting enough sleep and some of my clothes that I wore when I was 228 started to fit again.

I wanted to stop smoking but it's hard. I'll get through that, I'll think of a way.

I started to take care of my skin as part of the reinvention. I learned it from some of my downelink friends. A week ago I had warts removal for my face and neck. It was terribly painful! My skin has almost cleared except for this humongous wound on my nose, remnants of the wart removal. I can't help myself. I always scratch it and it always bleed. I was suppose to go back for checkup but I decided I would go back after the wound clears up. I'll be doing some peeling shits, maybe I'll elaborate it in my next blog.

Now for the good part. Yesterday (August 15), I went to the gym to attend a group exercise. I weighed myself and guess what? Drum roll please! I already lost 14 lbs! This weight lost is getting addictive. It entails a lot of hard work but it's part of the reinvention. Hopefully by November I have already reach 180 lbs and early next year I wish that I have reached my ultimate goal, the 150 lbs goal hehehe.

Breaking up workouts may burn fat faster

2007-08-01T07:26:00.000-07:00

Breaking up an exercise session, by adding a rest period in between, may boost a workout's fat-burning efficiency, a team of Japanese and Danish researchers reports.
When men exercised for two 30-minute stretches, taking a 20-minute rest break in between, they burned more fat than when they exercised for a single 60-minute session, and then rested afterward, Dr. Kazushige Goto of the University of Tokyo and colleagues found.
Current recommendations on exercise for preventing or treating obesity emphasize longer exercise sessions, Goto and his team note in the Journal of Applied Physiology. But there is evidence that following one exercise session with another workout may increase fat metabolism, they add.
To investigate, the researchers had seven healthy men complete one long workout and then two shorter workouts on exercise bicycles, measuring several different indicators of fat metabolism. All exercised at 60 percent of their maximum level of exertion.
When the men performed the two shorter exercise sessions, their blood levels of free fatty acids and other substances rose during the rest period, indicating greater fat metabolism. Levels of these substances also were higher during an hour-long rest period after the two-part exercise session.
Greater fat metabolism was recorded during each of the rest periods in the two-part session than during the rest period following the single, longer workout.
The men also showed lower levels of insulin and blood glucose during the second phase of the two-part exercise session.
While the proportion of total calories burned did not differ between the two workouts, fat represented nearly 77 percent of the calories burned in the recovery period after the two-part exercise session, compared with about 56 percent of calories burned in the recovery period after the single long exercise session.
Although a single bout of prolonged exercise is often performed in response to a physician's advice to exercise more, exercising for the same amount of time but with rest periods in between may be more effective, especially for sedentary or overweight individuals, the researchers conclude.

SOURCE: Journal of Applied Physiology, June 2007.

The Biggest Loser

2007-02-27T06:24:00.000-08:00

I've first watch the biggest loser in RPN 9. I was amazed by the transformation of the contestants. Since then I was an avid fan of the reality tv show.

Season 3 has just finished and they are already casting for the 4th season. The winner was a fireman from New York named Erik. Below are the before and after pics of the contestant.

THE WINNER

OTHER CONTESTANTS, winners on their own right

To learn more about the show, point your browsers to http://www.nbc.com/biggestloser.

Hi-Tech Exercise (The XaviX)

2007-02-01T19:29:00.000-08:00

I was browsing thru channels in our Television and I saw this gadget being featured.

The Gadget is called Xavix. Xavix is an interactive video game. It was created and developed by Jackie Chan's Team. It was first launched in HK and now is available in the Philippines. Xavix is exclusively distributed by Electronic Boutique.

"What’s great about the Xavix System is that as long as you have a TV, you can use it anytime you want and as much as you want. You can also own one or all the different games available, you can enjoy by yourself, or with your friends and family," said Mr. Abell Ngo, Vice-President of Electronics Botique - the sole distributor of Xavix in the Philippines.

Electronics Boutique
Level 1, East Wing, Robinsons Galeria 636-5077
Level 4, Market Market, Bonifacio Global City, Taguig 886-7939
Ground Floor, ParkSquare 1, Ayala Center, Makati City 816-2440
Level 3, New Wing, Alabang Town Center, Alabang, Muntinlupa City 772-3250 to 51
Level 3, Festival Super Mall, Alabang, Muntinlupa City 809-9100

There are peripherals that comes with it that make you move and feel that you are part of the game. There are many games to choose from.

1. XaviX Bass Fishing

2. XaviX Golf : there’s the Xavix Golf which lets the player use a wireless club for you to swing ang make that shot.

3. XaviX Bowling: The interactive Bowling game makes you use a wireless bowling ball controller and let’s you play a full ten frames or challenge other players.

4. XaviX Tennis : For those who love to swing racquets, the Tennis game allows compete in both singles and doubles matches using a wireless racquet controller.

5. XaviX BaseBall

6. XaviX AeroStep : The Aerostep cartridge contains various cardio workouts with a wireless J-MAT as a controller.

7. XaviX Jackie Chan Running

8. XaviX Power Boxing : The PowerBoxing uses boxing gloves for controllers and allows you to challenge boxing characters with different levels.

The good thing about this gadget is that it monitors the calories that you burn. You would know if you are progressing with the exercise. It also has weight tracker that you can store in its hard drive.

For those who can afford it and doesn't have the time to go to the gym. This is a must have!!

If you want to know more about this product you can logon to http://www.xavix.com/

Below is a sample video clip of XaviX.

Gym Substitute

2007-02-01T00:47:00.000-08:00

I wasn't able to go to the gym for this week. I had my car checked up for my trip to Sonya's Garden in Tagaytay this weekend. I was really guilty not being able to go to the gym. I had to do something. Good thing, I was able to get a copy of TURBO JAM. It's an exercise video created by Chalene Johnson.

Turbo Jam is a cardio exercise. It combines TAEBO & DANCE. The fitness instructor is very energetic that you will be encourage to do the whole fitness video. I recommend that you try this exercise video. One of the sidekicks that was on video lost 70lbs and she looks gorgeous.

Also, I have a pair of dumbells weighing 5lbs each. I do 2 sets of fifteen reps per muscle.

I hope this would be enough until I could go back to the gym. Below is a sample video. Enjoy!

South Beach Diet Phase 1 (Pinoy Style)

2007-01-27T23:43:00.000-08:00

I've spoken with a friend of mine in Dubai, UAE last night. She said she's having problem breathing and it seems that she's having heart burned. I got worried. I told her that I will create a menu for 2 weeks that she will follow. Below is a modified South Beach Diet Plan for Phase 1.

===========================================

Menu plan for 2 weeks (South Beach Diet Pinoy Style)

Quick Notes:

Use Olive Oil or Canola (cheaper) for frying.
Cucumber Sticks goes well with real mayo (look at the back of the label for 0 carbs or 1%)
Nuts, Alternate different kinds of Nuts for variety
Cheese, Same with nuts Alternate diff kinds
You can have deserts for dinner, suggestion is Jell-O (make sure its sugar Free)
Stock on Peanut Butter for unscheduled hunger
You can Follow the menu or if no time choose the ones that are easy to prepare.
Avoid Milk and Cola for 2 weeks. If you can’t help it, drink Coke Lite instead.
Avoid Potatoes and Carrots because they are high in Carbs
Minimize Breadings or Flour.
RICE IS BAD. IT KILLS YOU!
Have a Cheat Day on the 15th day so you won’t feel deprived.

Day 1

Breakfast: Ham and Cheese Omelette (with Tomato Ketsup)
Snacks: Peanuts
Lunch: Fried Pork Chop with Romaine Salad
Snacks: 2 slices of Cheese
Dinner: Sinigang na baboy

Day 2

Breakfast: Chicken Salad with Lettuce
Snacks: Cucumber Sticks with Mayo
Lunch: Sweet and Sour Meat Balls (lessen the floor use eggwhite as binder)
Snacks: 2 tablespoon peanut butter (unsweetened)
Dinner: Ginisang Shrimp and Sitaw

Day 3

Breakfast: Tapa & Egg with Tomatoes
Snacks: Almond Nuts
Lunch: Pan Fried Chicken with Sauteed Monggo Sprouts
Snacks: Fried Tofu with Vinegar dip
Dinner: Tinolang Chicken Breast

Day 4

Breakfast: Tuna Salad with Lettuce
Snacks: Singkamas
Lunch: Fried Tilapia and Cucumber Sticks
Snacks: Buttered Baguio Beans
Dinner: Tofu and Kangkong in Oyster Sauce

Day 5

Breakfast: Bacon and Scrambled Eggs with Tomatoes and Onion
Snacks: Nuts
Lunch: Chicken Breast Adobo with Itlog na pula and kamatis
Snacks: Cheese Sticks
Dinner: Pork Mushroom

Day 6

Breakfast: Egg Salad with Cucumber and Cheese
Snacks: Singkamas
Lunch: Ginisang Munggo and Pan Fried Chicken Breast
Snacks: Cheese Sticks
Dinner: Pan Fried Steak with Steamed Baguio Beans

Day 7

Breakfast: Manggo and Shrimp Salad
Snacks: Nuts
Lunch: Stuffed Bangus with Steamed Cauli Flower
Snacks: 1 small apple
Dinner: Pork Adobo with Kangkong

Day 8

Breakfast Tuna Salad with Lettuce
Snacks: Cucumber Sticks
Lunch: Steamed Tilapia. Stir Fried Cabbage and Munggo Sprouts
Snacks: Nuts
Dinner Sauteed Squid and Tahong with Sitaw

Day 9

Breakfast: Tuna n Mushroom Omellette
Snacks: Cheese sticks
Lunch: Pan Fried Chicken Breast with Buttered Baguio Beans
Snacks: Peanut Butter (2 tbsp)
Dinner: Nilagang Baka (without Potatoes)

Day 10

Breakfast: Chicken Salad with Lettuce
Snacks: Singkamas
Lunch: Bistek with lots of Onions
Snacks: Nuts
Dinner: Porkchop and Ginisang Munggo

Day 11

Breakfast: Bacon, Lettuce and Tomatoe salad
Snacks: Boiled Egg
Lunch: Stir Fried Tofu
Snacks: Cheese Sticks
Dinner: Sinigang na Bangus

Day 12

Breakfast: Fried Bangus and Tomatoes
Snacks: Nuts
Lunch: Ampalaya con Carne
Snacks: Cucumber Sticks
Dinner: Beef with Mushroom

Day 13:

Breakfast: Longanisa/Sausage with Tomatoes and Lettuce
Snacks: Boiled Egg
Lunch: Sauteed Chicken Breast with Munggo Sprouts
Snack: Steamed Baguio Beans
Dinner: Adobong Pusit

Day 14:

Breakfast: Mushroom and Cheese Omellete
Snacks: Nuts
Lunch: Steam Tilapia with Mayo, Onions and Pickles
Snacks: Cheese Sticks
Dinner: Kare Kare

Day 15:

CHEAT DAY! YAHOO!

Losing Weight

2007-01-27T01:07:00.000-08:00

I've taken my picture one early morning and I couldn't believe what I saw. It seems that I am already losing weight. Though many people are still not noticing it but I feel and know that I really am.

The lemonade diet works for me. I'm doing a mild lemonade diet. The rice is still off in my diet plan and I try to have just one meal a day. The senna tea is working miracles because my bowel movement is already getting regular. Though there are still times that I couldn't control it and I have to rush to a nearby store to get tissue paper.

There is weight lost competition in fitness first but I still can't join because the personal trainer that was assigned to me hasn't created my fitness program. The prize is 100k pesos and a free trip to boracay. I really wanted to join to motivate myself more to loose more weight.

Follow up on Master Cleanse

2007-01-22T21:16:00.000-08:00

It has been more than two weeks since I tried the Master Cleanse. I realized it is a hard diet to follow. At first, I thought I was failing but I came accross the Yahoo article about it.
====================================
Maple Syrup Diet
Lose over a stone in just a fortnight! That’s the promise of the Maple Syrup Diet followed by pop star Beyonce. But is this diet really the best way to shift those excess pounds and will it work for everyone? WLR’s dietitian Juliette Kellow investigates...

Maple Syrup Diet

By WLR Dietitian
Juliette Kellow BSc RD

This month, the papers have been full of reports about a new diet made famous by pop star Beyonce Knowles.

The ex-Destiny’s Child singer spilled the beans on how she slimmed down and lost 1½ stone in just two weeks for her new movie, Dreamgirls, due for release next January. Beyonce’s diet apparently consisted of eating nothing for a fortnight, instead surviving on detox drinks consisting of a syrup mixed with lemon juice, water and cayenne pepper!

The syrup – Madal Bal Natural Tree Syrup – is made from the sap of maple and palm trees. Also known as The Lemon Detox, the diet was introduced more than 30 years ago by naturopath Stanley Burroughs. Many of the claimed benefits include weight loss, cleansing the body of toxins, greater resistance to illness, improved concentration, increased energy, clearer skin and eyes, shinier hair and stronger nails.

The detox drink itself is made by mixing 2 tablespoons of the Natural Tree Syrup (which they say is 20ml) with 2 tablespoons of freshly squeezed lemon juice, a pinch of cayenne pepper or ginger and half a pint of hot or cold water. It’s recommended you drink as much as you like, but ideally six to nine glasses daily.

There are also four detox plans to choose from:
The Full Detox – this involves surviving solely on the detox drink for 10 days, although it’s recommended that beginners follow it for just 5–7 days. It can also be extended for up to 14 days, but should only be done so with the consent of a health professional.
Relaxed Version – this involves substituting breakfast, dinner or both these meals with 2–3 glasses of the detox drink. But you should still avoid sweets, processed foods, red meat, fried food, white bread, dairy products, coffee and booze for the remaining meals.
The Once a Week version – as the name suggests, you skip food and have the detox drinks on one day each week.
The Master Plan – a hardcore plan that involves a twice-yearly multi-day detox combined with detoxing once a week!
WLR says:

Pop star Beyonce may have a figure that many of us envy, but it seems she believes in the ‘no pain, no gain’ mantra to get it that way. In fact, this is one of the most extreme diets ever and makes Carol Vorderman’s detox plans look like a positive food fest.

This diet is potentially dangerous. Effectively, it involves drinking nothing but sugared water for days on end. Of course you will lose weight, but that’s purely the result of limiting calories excessively.

A tablespoon (which they say is 10ml) of Natural Tree Syrup contains just 26 calories. That means if you have six drinks a day (each containing the recommended 2 tablespoons of syrup), your daily intake will be just 312 calories. Even nine drinks only provide 468 calories.

The effects of crash diet

This low calorie diet plan will leave you hungry, irritable and lacking in energy as your blood sugar levels go on a roller coaster ride of highs and lows. And chances are, the pounds will go straight back on as soon as you ditch the diet.

But it’s not just the extremely low calorie content that’s worrying. These drinks are devoid of protein, fibre, vitamins, minerals and all the naturally occurring plant chemicals (Phytochemicals) we know help to keep us fit and healthy. After just a few days, it’s likely you’ll become constipated due to the complete lack of fibre in the diet. And if you follow this diet for any length of time, you could end up with low nutrient levels, including iron, calcium, zinc and vitamin C. Meanwhile, a combination of sugar and acid (from the lemon juice) is also a disaster for teeth and so may increase the risk of dental decay.

As for the idea that the body needs to detox, this is simply nonsense. Our bodies are cleverly designed to get rid of waste products and toxins – that’s one of the main functions of our liver and kidneys.

Worryingly though, these facts aren’t stopping people from buying this product. Even though it costs a massive £39.99 for a litre (enough for 5 to 7 days), the company that distribute Madal Bal Natural Tree Syrup say they’ve gone from selling 500 tins a year to around 2,000 a month!

Crash Diet Versus Healthy Eating

Bottom line: this is a crash diet – and one of the worst! Put it to the back of your mind and concentrate on getting a bootylicious body by eating a healthy diet that will shift those pounds slowly – but keep them off for good.

Resource: http://www.weightlossresources.co.uk/diet/maple-syrup.htm
======================================================
So I followed the Relaxed Version. Having 1 meal a day and the rest was lemonade and the senna tea at night.

It worked. I lost 5 lbs in 4 days. The catch is that the moment you tried to eat again. The weight goes back fast. You really have to be careful with this diet.

The senna tea makes you poop all day. I recommend that you take the senna tea at night so that if you have plans the next day you won't regret it. One time I took it and went to the mall. I rushed to the nearest grocery to buy tissue paper.

It has been a week and I haven't gone to the gym. There was always a reason not to go there. Maybe it is just me.

I need to get back on my feet. Hope that when I check on my weight I would be happy.

2007-01-22T20:46:00.000-08:00

DIET TRICKS
Tape a picture of your skinny self to the refrigerator for inspiration. Remind yourself what you can look like.
Tape a picture of your fat self to the refrigerator for motivation. Remind yourself what you don’t want to look like.
Limit head-on visions. Do a “Miss America,” and stand at an angle that presents a three-quarter body profile.
Don’t keep up with the Joneses. Take one bite of food for every two your dining companion takes.
“Boost” your sandwiches with lettuce, tomato, sprouts, cucumber slices, bell peppers, and other fresh veggies. Along with the bigger crunch, you’ll get a bigger sandwich with few additional calories and no extra fat.
Take a shower or bath when a food craving strikes. It will relax you, and keep your whole body occupied and out of trouble (i.e., the kitchen) until the craving fades.
Phone a talkative friend when a food craving strikes. Call from a corded phone outside the kitchen, and stay on until the craving fades.
Brush your teeth, floss, gargle, or chew a stick of gum immediately after your meal to stop yourself from eating more.
Stand near fatter people. They make you look thinner.
To add length to round faces, part hair on the side, in a silky straight down do, or in an upsweep. Keep bangs on the wispy side, if you wear them, to avoid a face-broadening horizontal line.
Smash your trash. When you throw food away, thoroughly bury it under more trash so there will be absolutely no question of changing your mind. No need to explain.
Computer-enhance a photo of yourself to see how great you’ll look when you’re slim.
Never mind liposuction: Today’s computer technology lets you delete double chins and narrow your waistline with the touch of a keystroke. Print out a copy and keep it in your purse.
Chew sugarless gum while you prepare meals. It’ll keep you from tasting (eating) that extra serving’s worth.
Cross your legs at your ankles. Your thighs and calves will look slimmer.
Drink a tall glass of water before every meal. It’s a healthy way to quench your hunger.
Get a tan. A tan helps you look thinner
Work for your snacks. Before you eat a high-calorie snack, clean the bathroom or vacuum the house. Don’t eat until the faucets and sink are gleaming.
Have your teeth cleaned professionally and whitened. You won’t want to sully that gorgeous mouth with “bad” food.
Give yourself a manicure when a craving strikes, applying extra layers of slow-drying nail polish. It will keep your hands occupied and out of trouble until the craving fades.

Third Attempt Failed!

2007-01-10T06:31:00.000-08:00

I have tried again the master cleanse diet for the third day. Unfortunately, I failed again. What would be the equation for the success of this diet? They say try and try until you die and I will.

The day started for me fine. I didn't have any cravings at all. I drank my saline (salt and water) and it tasted wierd. I could finish the I glassed that I prepared. What I did was to mix it with the lemonade. I was able to finished it. I then went online to check on my emails and chat on the side. I then prepared for the gym. I was daring my self to attend a spinning class. But unfortunately I was late. So I opted to attend Body Combat (taebo exercise) I did good because I did break a sweat. After that, I felt my adrenaline was still rushing. I jumped on the threadmill and a trainer approach me. I thought he was going to stop me from running. Then he asked if I was Jericho. I said yes. He introduced himself, he was the trainer that was calling me for days. I was avoiding him because I wanted to do my excercise on my own pace. But I got caught. So he invited me to the personal trainer's table and scheduled my for tomorrow for my power pack exercise. Let see what happens.

After going to the gym, I went to the grocery to grab some lemons and other stuff for the diet. I was looking for a particular tea. I saw one it says on the label sencha. I was glad but I feel that this was not the correct laxative tea. I browse around more and voila! I found it, Biguerlai Slimming Tea. I read the label an it said made from sensa fruit and leaves. This is it! I went to the baking section, unfortunately there was no 100% maple syrup there so I just opted for the honey. But as the Master Cleanse clearly stated. Get a maple syrup and honey is not an option. What the heck? I just hope that honey will work as a substitute. I'll let you know if it does.

I went home and attached the chandelier on the ceiling. While doing that my aunt arrive with leftovers from the Nazarene Feast. I am being tempted again. And same as the first and second I gave in again. I ate a lot!

I'm about to go to sleep and drinking the Sensa Tea. Must be wondering how it taste? Hmmm it tasted like green tea but smell funky. You know what I mean. Fair enough! I could drink this. Just to cleanse my system and to lose weight. I'm going to finish the book now. I'll let you know what happens tomorrow.

Two Failed Attempts

2007-01-09T07:03:00.000-08:00

I was trying my best to embark on the Master Cleanse Diet. Two days ago, I tried to start the Master Cleanse diet. Three days ago I already prepared the lemonade diet. I read the ebook of Master Cleanse by Stanley Borroughs. On the first day I almost made it but at the end of the day I ate carbonara, left overs from my sisters birthday. On the second day (today), I thought I will make it but unfortunately my sister came along with a friend with pizza. I couldn't help myself. I ate 3 slices. This diet was harder than I thought. Hopefully, the third attempt will be a success. I won't give up!

P.S. I also notice that during this diet when I smoke I get dizzy. I don't know if I should give up smoking... It make it even harder.

Out with the old in with the new.

2007-01-03T07:35:00.000-08:00

Everyone has started the new year with a bang. We'll I didn't. Remember the last post? The cheat day. Well, It wasn't a cheat day. It was a cheat week. I had all the food that I wanted. I just couldn't help it. I've let my guard down. I was attacked when I was vulnerable. Now, I'm struggling again. It's a good thing I did a precautionary measure. Last december 29, I enrolled myself in fitness first. I felt I needed to do something.

Then January 3 came ( I should have started January 2) then I went to the gym. I arrived 9:30 am. I thought I was late. Before I hit the class, I jumped on the weighing scale and got shocked. I weighed 233lbs. DAMN IT! The instructor for the group exercise was also late! Good Thing. Then we started. I was having trouble dancing because I was heavy. But I enjoyed the class. This would be my third time to enroll. I hope this time would be a success.

It was a good thing that I enrolled so I have to kick my own ass to get out of bed and go to the gym.

Another thing that I am going to try out is the master cleanse diet. I heard it from the radio station magic 89.9 that beyonce knowles did that diet and lost a lot of weight. It's kinda hard because it only involves liquid intakes. You can look for a download of an ebook, The Master Cleanse by Stanley Borroughs. I think you only drink juices for 2 days. Whew! But out with the old and in with the new. Wish me luck!

Crunches With Belly Fat?

2007-01-03T07:30:00.000-08:00

I've read thru this article on MSN. This might interest you guys.

By Jacqueline Stenson
Contributing editor
MSNBC
Updated: 1:03 p.m. ET Dec. 28, 2006

If you're trying to lose belly fat, should you just do aerobic activity to shed the pounds, or should you also do crunches even though you won't see those abs for a while? And just what is a one-rep max?

Q: My midsection is where I need to lose the most weight. I'd like to get a nice flat stomach eventually, and I know to do that I have to do crunches at some point. But with all the fat, shouldn't I lose that first, then work on toning my torso? Or should I do cardio along with the crunches. After all, no one will be able to see my abs under my belly fat.

A: Well, yes, you can have a serious six-pack yet not be able to see it because it's covered in fat. So you do need to lose the weight in order to get a lean, mean midsection. And if you're like a lot of people, you may be carrying a little extra jelly belly around from all that holiday feasting.
But why wait to do the crunches or other abdominal work? It's hardly a wasted effort, since having toned abs also helps keep your core strong and prevent back aches.

Plus, you'll get to your ultimate goal of a "nice flat stomach" faster if you do both, notes Gina Lombardi, a personal trainer in Los Angeles. Otherwise, once you lose the weight, you have to start from scratch on toning the muscles.

"I always recommend doing both," says Lombardi. "Best to tone up what's under all that belly fat while the fat is disappearing."

So how much aerobic exercise is enough? That depends a lot on how much you eat and what kind of activity you're doing and for how long. To lose a pound of fat, you need to create a deficit of 3,500 calories.

As for those abs, aim to do crunches at least three times a week. Start with one or two sets of 10 repetitions and work up to three sets of 20, Lombardi says.

Q: What do you mean by one-repetition maximum? How do I determine that?

A: A one-repetition maximum is the highest amount of weight that you can lift or press one time. So, for instance, it would be the most weight you can bench press or lift on the calf machine.

Personal trainers commonly advise clients to use a weight that is a certain percentage of their "one-rep max." They might say to do two to three sets of 10 biceps curls at 70 percent of your one-rep max. Then they might advise you to work up to 80 percent of your one-rep max.
The point is to not overdo it. If you max out and your muscles aren't ready for it, you risk injury.
There is no one best way to strength train, so you'll often hear various suggestions for weight programs. It's good to mix them up to keep your muscles challenged.

The cheat day

2006-12-25T06:21:00.001-08:00

It's christmas! Hectic christmas but overall it was a happy christmas. It is cheat day ... Actually days ... Christmas eve and Christmas day. I ate a lot. I have to do a double time work on my diet. I felt I gained 20lbs again. Plus I drank tequila. But it's the time of the year to be merry. Forget the diet and just make up for it.

Merry Christmas!

Stuck on 215

2006-12-16T03:02:00.000-08:00

I have been on 215lbs for more than a 2 weeks. I don't know what to do. I tried to track my steps and I have to admit I have been very bad. I ate some pastas, potatoes and ice cream.
That is the reason why I am stucked on 215. Plus I am not exercising. I consulted my friend mark whom I refer to as dr. serna. He has helped me a lot in this weight battle.

I'm starting to get frustrated with this. I need a battle plan.

He gave me options:
1. Metabolism Shock - changing of carb intake, like on a 3 day plan. The first day would be low carbs, then 2nd day is med carbs intake and 3rd day is high carbs. Then you could switch it. Your metabolism will then get confuse and in effect will increase.

2. Ketogenic Diet - High in fat, zero in carbs and less protein. I research on the net that the ketogenic diet is a diet primarily made for epileptic patients and was later on became a diet for everyone. But before you go into this diet you must take precautionary measure because this diet is not really that healthy. You have to take a multi-vitamin everyday to complete your nutrition. With the ketogenic diet, Your body goes on a "fasting mode" thus your body will feed on your body fats. Things to remember when on a ketogenic diet:
a. Take Multi-Vitamins
b. Drink less water
c. You will get constipation
d. this is not a lifestyle, this is a diet meaning this is ONLY for drastic measures.

I have chosen the ketogenic diet because desperate times needs desperate measures. I will post my experience with the diet. Wish me luck.

The 199 goal

2006-12-16T02:58:00.000-08:00

I've spoken with Mark lately. Mark is a friend of mine, we were coworkers before. He gave me tips like to suppress craving, go brush your teeth and it works.

I said my mid goal is to get to the Hundreds weight. That is to get to 199 then we will celebrate.
I'm excited about that. I would like to change my looks to give me a fresher look. Me and Jell will meet up on monday. She will accompany me to fix salon in podium to get a haircut.

I'm targeting this haircut but the thing is my hair is a bit wavy. I tried to rebond it again and did some hairspa. The hair was a bit straight. I hope this will do.

This is me now.

I hope they can do miracles.
GO FOR 199!!!

The Tickets

2006-12-16T02:56:00.000-08:00

I've read thru my journal and It was Oct 7 that I started dieting and the last weigh in with mercury drug was last November 17. The last weight was 240lbs. I felt that I lost more pounds than that because before the weigh in I had a food trip. Quickly, tuknene, isaw, gulaman, squid balls, kikiam and to top it all off ice cream. Then I decided to check my weight. and I got the 240lbs.

The best thing about this is that my Blood Pressure is normalizing which is pretty good meaning
I'm getting healthtier.
Here are the scanned tickets.
October 17, 2006

October 29, 2006

November 13, 2006

The Mercury Drug Measurements

2006-12-16T02:54:00.000-08:00

Date: October 20, 2006, 15:07

I went to mercury drug last sunday morning (3 AM) to check on my weight I have this feeling that I indeed lost some pounds. So I step on the measuring machine. I was shocked and happy. I did lose weight. Yahoo!!! 9 lbs.

This is my second week for south beach diet I am wondering how much weight I lost this week. My weighing scale here at home is not reliable. I had some flaws again but the good thing is I'm beginning to accept that flaws in the diet are ok.

I finally found what went wrong with all the diets that I tried. Its not accepting the flaws and letting the flaws take over me and get depressed. So finally I think I'm on the right track.

Next up. The exercise battle. God Help me!

Missed Blog

2006-12-16T02:52:00.000-08:00

Saturday, October 07, 2006
Two days ago, I was suppose to start my southbeach diet. Though there are a lot of temptations. When I woke up my mother has already prepared pork intestine and rice. It was tempting so I gave in. But I started to avoid eating that day.

Yesterday. I started the diet but I feel that its not yet fully geared up. Below is the food intake I had the whole day.

Breakfast : Salad Vinaigrette (Romaine Lettuce, Nuts, Cucumber and Vinaigrette) Beef Slices
Snacks : Nuts
Lunch: Munggo ( with Pork Ribs and chicharon)
Snacks: Doritos and Choco Flakes
Dinner: Munggo
Jello
Choco Flakes

I was happy I wasn’t able to take in rice but the problem is I had Doritos and Choco Flakes. I gave in to Temptation so I’m Back to Zero Today. But I’ll make sure that I will not give it. TODAY IS DAY ONE!!!

Breakfast: Green Tea
1 Scrambled Egg with Cheese
1 Beef Breakfast with Bean Sprouts
Snacks: Sugar Free Jello
Lunch: Chicken And Togue Lumpia

Lost weight?

2006-12-16T02:50:00.000-08:00

Date: September 03, 2006, 22:48

I wasn't expecting that I would lose weight. I was cleaning my room and saw the weighing scale. I attempted to look at my current weight. I was suprise that I lost weight.

With all the experimenting on fried apples, eating my heart out on rice and dishes that I love.
It must be the sleepless nights that I've been having. I need to continue this routine of sleep but this time I'll cut down on my rice and everything.

Let's see what happens.

successful attempt?

2006-12-16T02:49:00.001-08:00

For the past week since the start of the biggestloser competition I wasn't able to start. The food in our refrigerator is always packed with the food that I want to eat.

What's more those food are good with rice.

But today, I was able to eat without rice. The day for me has not ended yet but will see.

The Biggest Loser Manila Edition

2006-12-16T02:46:00.000-08:00

Date: August 20, 2006, 13:40

early in the morning around 2 pm me and some of my friends went to mercury drug qmart. We wanted to check our weight. You must be wondering why? We have agreed to put a bet on the biggestloser on the 3rd month (November 20). P2000 for each person, 3 people, winner takes it all. I'm so excited because this is the motivation that I am looking for.

This is the stats based on the measuring machine in Mercury.

Height: 5"6' --- this is so not true ...
Weight: 259 lbs --- woah
Blood Pressure: - 159/82 .... I'm High Blood damn!
Body Fat Index: 44.2% ... almost half of my body is fat!

Wish me luck! the battle is on for the biggestloser

2006-12-16T02:44:00.000-08:00

Date: August 19, 2006, 13:20

I wanted to start with the diet but i can't. my will power is so low.

I tried ... on the first day i had eggs and hotdogs... by lunch time i ate a lot of rice.

My sleeping habits are so bad ... i need to change it.

Jex come on you can do better!

Biggest Loser

2006-12-16T02:40:00.000-08:00

Date: August 15, 2006, 23:42

I've always wanted to be in the biggestloser show but unfortunately it hasn't been sindicated here in the philippines. What the heck! I'm going to do it on my own. starting tomorrow i'll be dedicating my 14 weeks in losing weight and this blog will be a witness to it..

Jex
Age: 27
Height: 173.73cm
Start weight: 116.11964672 kg
Current weight: 116.11964672kgTarget weight: 68
Hometown: San Jose Del Monte Bulacan

this is me now.